RED Is Boring And Stone Sucks

Gonna make this short, the last two films I saw in theatres were RED and Stone. Neither of these turned out to be worth my time.

RED is apathetically written. It feels like a money grab, and a bad one at that. The only really interesting part here is Helen Mirren doing action scenes,

because that is something we should just see more often. But Morgan Freeman was literally two poorly written scenes away from not being in the movie and Bruce Willis (who is in fact supposed to be the lead in this thing) disappears for a good thirty minutes of the climax. The movie is only an hour and fifty minutes. That's a long time to go without your main character doing ANYTHING.

I don't even want to get started on Stone. Ugh, Edward Norton did an impressive job... his voice was crazy perfect. And for the lesser half of the film that he actually appears in I did feign interest. But I don't know how many more De Niro performances I can sit through. Not when they're so distorted and confusing as this. I guess it's not his fault... though in a way it is. He still has the power to pick his projects. And it's unbelievable that this movie was greenlit, but I guess sometimes that's just the way it goes. Shame on you Angus MacLachlan. You wrote a pointless piece of garbage.

If you're planning on seeing a movie this week, go see Waiting For Superman, Jackass 3D, The Social Network (again), or Paranormal Activity 2/Hereafter (I don't even have much hope for those last two films). But it would be wise of you to skip out on those two apocryphal pieces named in the title above. I can tell you this much, you'd lose a lot less braincells watching Jackass 3D.