X-Men: First Class Farce

I've seen X-Men: First Class twice now. Not because I really had to revisit the movie so quickly after my initial view... in fact it was quite the opposite. As soon as I walked out of that first screening I dreaded the realization that, because I work in a movie theatre, I would have to go see it two more times for friends. But c'est la vie.

It's not that I hate the movie. There are certain elements that work perfectly.

When McAvoy and Fassbender are on screen it's almost too perfect. They're each so hypnotic in their abilities to hammer the script into their own purposes. And that script had to be hammered. One of the most obvious signs of a great actor is the ability to make clumsy dialogue sound interesting and real... and I could cite at least five times that McAvoy was forced to do this and still somehow came back with a charming variation on the words that at no time felt clumsy.

However, in other members of the cast it was clear as January they could not whittle through the wood.

She's really bad... she's really really bad.

Kevin Bacon still managed to bring fun to the screen and I enjoyed this Sebastian Shaw. It would be nice for him to have other goals. And in that early sequence where he brings young Erik to his room, I doubt I was the only person in the theatre who wondered why the boy didn't target his rage at the man who had actually wronged him considering there was all that metal around.

The inclusion of Havok was a massive misstep as well. The character has no purpose if he doesn't have Cyclops around. And the actor underperforms to the max. Actually, all of the side mutants (Havok, Darwin, Riptide {who?}, Angel Salvadore, Azazel)* all fell short of the mark. It's one thing to introduce new mutants. It's quite another to force them upon us, reiterate the same conversation fifteen times in hopes we think this means they care about something and then leave us without any arcs. They learned how to use their powers? Okay. Do I actually care? Nope. Nice work.
*For some reason, I was okay with Banshee.

And when I say they repeat that same conversation fifteen times I'm not exaggerating. I get it, it sucks to be different from other people. But that's really just because you're all a bunch of whiny kids who can't seem to come to grips with how cool your powers are. I think everyone would agree if they had a mutant power like any of these guys... somebody commenting on how weird they are really wouldn't even place in their mind. The point of X-Men is actually deeper because that conversation is not on the surface (maybe once or twice even is acceptable) until we have gotten to understand these characters motives... their history. Something we only truly get out of Magneto... and even then it could have been written more sensibly.

This isn't to say I don't like the movie. It was fine. If the next one has more Magneto/Xavier and builds on that I will probably enjoy it very much. But I'm still looking for a movie with balls like the first X-Men. It took the mutant argument and made it real, fleshed it out, made it interesting. Any time Ian or Patrick were talking something wonderful was being said. And the action was pretty damn well thought out. Lots of practical effects went into that movie and the movie succeeded for a million and a half of those reasons. X-2 was awesome as well. Even more so I'd say. We saw more of characters we loved and learned to better understand them. And at the end of X-2 we were given a promise...

a very specific promise. Then the third X-Men came along and destroyed every decibel of our hopes and dreams that that promise would every come to the screen. Then Wolverine was a joke.

So I guess I'm just glad this was better than those last two... but, honestly, that's not saying very much at all. From a wayward fan to a wayward producer, couldn't we just agree that since people are still coming out to these flicks it's okay to take more time and allow more interesting people onto the project? Start with plot and revamp it all with a writing team that proves they care. Cast some actors like McAvoy and Fassbender... people who know their way around a camera... who don't halfass their way through every line (I'm looking at January). These can be so great. And you're already putting the money into them, so why not be proud of the content as well?