However, this comes with an asterisk. Truly, The Counselor couldn't possibly be the worst movie ever made. There are far shittier ultra-low budget, never released shit-fests out there... Monos, The Hands of Fate comes to mind. But movies like that never stood a chance. The Counselor had... well... practically everything going for it:
The film sported an all star cast most producers would be drooling over. Michael Fassbender, Penelope Cruz, Javier Bardem, Brad Pitt, and...
That was the first sign the dream was crumbling. Then...
|Weird how they both have that same eerie smile...|
Nope. No dice. Sorry to disappoint you.
For all of the positives this film seemed to be sporting, at the end of the day none of those great actors could outperform this god awful script. Sure a few of them really tried. They practically succeeded. But then Cameron Diaz would come on screen and everyone, for some reason, just let her take over. I have to say, Cameron Diaz should never have been allowed to play this part. Now in her defense, I don't think anyone could have actually made it work, but I tend to doubt literally any other actor would have played it quite as poorly as she did.
Spoilers if you care... but do you really? This is a warning, so you probably want to read this.
Once Cameron Diaz takes over the movie... well more at the very end at which point it already had become hers... she begins to monologue. And her ability to do this is so incredibly lacking I immediately burst out in laughter. I'm talking one of the worst sequences I have ever seen put to film. I'm talking the end of all that is good and pure and meaningful in this world bad. This is the last scene before the credits.
I hate this movie. I love Michael Fassbender, but somehow as the title character Cormac McCarthy managed to write a script that gave him nothing, I mean NOTHING, to do.
Not only did The Counselor tease me with a potential starring role for one of my all time favorite actors (Fassbender),
Thanks for ruining my night Cormac McCarthy. I won't soon forget this.